kittys know

zombie wedding: we have feelings too!

i have been inundated with weddings!

this one, however had nothing to do with me. that being said, now that i've been alerted to it, i may need to beg one of my affianced step-sisters to rethink their plans. zombie wedding!

not only did the bride and groom get all dressed up for the big day, but friends on hand made sure the entire party was appropriate for the outing. they paraded to the official's office in all their glory, then spent the rest of the day drinking about town. i don't think TLC's wedding battle could have done better.

though my russian is a little rusty--thank you google translate-- these crazy kids are both on their third marriage, so i guess it was time to spice things up. and maybe after all those previous spouses, they needed something a little more permanent than "till death do us part."  strangely, when the interviewer asked if "the last time is special too,"  they replied " Oh yes!   It was a punk wedding - trash and refuse in our money instead of throwing beer caps, would still buy the grubs, but have not found."  --yeah, um thanks google translate... :/

perhaps they are zombies everyday and only put on the punk part specially... if so, i guess i can excuse both julia and rebecca from altering their current design scheme. i'm not sure i want to be a part of the trash and refuse. nor would i be particularly fond of the bridesmaid trash-bag dresses.

then again, it pleases me to see people who have found each other. all of us have a little bit of crazy in us, some more than others sure.  but despite my sometimes cynical outlook on love and certainly on marriage, the romantic in me warms, if only for their momentary happiness.

these guys know what i'm talking about. thanks mr. gosling. My Body's A Zombie For You by Dead Man's Bones

sometimes nothing is sweeter than falling asleep on someone's arm. even when you're a zombie.

A Valentine for the geek in all of us: John Hodgman, "Aliens, love -- where are they?"

the brilliant John Hodgman, Daily Show correspondent, humorist, and -yes- "PC", shares a funny, touching look on love and aliens.

riding the subway through a blizzard to the dreaded "day job," feeling Valentine's day looming ahead... i laughed out loud at Hodgman's deadpan bafflement. and yes, i admit, got a little misty at his conclusion.

here's to all of us finding our other out there in the great beyond.

o fortuna

o fortuna

O Fortuna - O Fortune,
velut luna - like the moon
statu variabilis, - you are changeable,
semper crescis - ever waxing
aut decrescis; - and waning;
vita detestabilis - hateful life
nunc obdurat - first oppresses
et tunc curat - and then soothes
ludo mentis aciem, - as fancy takes it;
egestatem, - poverty
potestatem - and power
dissolvit ut glaciem. - it melts them like ice.

Sors immanis - Fate - monstrous
et inanis, - and empty,
rota tu volubilis, - you whirling wheel,
status malus, - you are malevolent,
vana salus - well-being is vain
semper dissolubilis, - and always fades to nothing,
obumbrata - shadowed
et velata - and veiled
michi quoque niteris; - you plague me too;
nunc per ludum - now through the game
dorsum nudum - I bring my bare back
fero tui sceleris. - to your villainy.


Sors salutis - Fate is against me
et virtutis - in health
michi nunc contraria, - and virtue,
est affectus - driven on
et defectus - and weighted down,
semper in angaria. - always enslaved.
Hac in hora - So at this hour
sine mora - without delay
corde pulsum tangite; - pluck the vibrating strings;
quod per sortem - since Fate
sternit fortem, - strikes down the string man,
mecum omnes plangite! - everyone weep with me!



i had the distinct pleasure of going to see carmina burana with andrew this weekend. as a lover of overly dramatical events and bad horror movies, i am obviously a fan of the most famous "o fortuna." beyond that, the rest of the piece is also quite lovely. poems set to music, with a unsuspected amount of humor, including a song sung by a swan (the tenor) as he is eaten and one sung by a drunken baritone in revelry--one of my favorites for its dueling melodies:



Ego sum abbas Cucaniensis - I am the abbot of Cockaigne
et consilium meum est cum bibulis,- and my assembly is one of drinkers,
et in secta Decii voluntas mea est,- and I wish to be in the order of Decius,
et qui mane me quesierit in taberna, - and whoever searches me out at the tavern in the morning,
post vesperam nudus egredietur, - after Vespers he will leave naked,
et sic denudatus veste clamabit: - and thus stripped of his clothes he will call out:

(Baritone and Male Chorus)
Wafna, wafna! - Woe! Woe!
quid fecisti sors turpissima? - what have you done, vilest Fate?
Nostre vite gaudia - the joys of my life
abstulisti omnia! - you have taken all away!...

[...] Bibit hera, bibit herus, - The mistress drinks, the master drinks,
bibit miles, bibit clerus, - the soldier drinks, the priest drinks,
bibit ille, bibit illa, - the man drinks, the woman drinks,
bibit servus cum ancilla, - the servant drinks with the maid,
bibit velox, bibit piger, - the swift man drinks, the lazy man drinks,
bibit albus, bibit niger, - the white man drinks, the black man drinks,
bibit constans, bibit vagus, - the settled man drinks, the wanderer drinks,
bibit rudis, bibit magnus. - the stupid man drinks, the wise man drinks,

Bibit pauper et egrotus, - The poor man drinks, the sick man drinks,
bibit exul et ignotus, - the exile drinks, and the stranger,
bibit puer, bibit canus, - the boy drinks, the old man drinks,
bibit presul et decanus, - the bishop drinks, and the deacon,
bibit soror, bibit frater, - the sister drinks, the brother drinks,
bibit anus, bibit mater, - the old lady drinks, the mother drinks,
bibit ista, bibit ille, - this man drinks, that man drinks,
bibunt centum, bibunt mille. - a hundred drink, a thousand drink.
After seeing it, I was compelled to look up the translation and am not altogether surprised by the dark misery evident in even the love songs, though i am surprised by how sexual the love songs become:

...Siqua sine socio, - The girl without a lover
caret omni gaudio; - misses out on all pleasures,
tenet noctis infima - she keeps the dark night
sub intimo - hidden
cordis in custodia: - in the depth of her heart;

fit res amarissima. - it is a most bitter fate.....

[....] O sodales, ludite, - O friends, you are making fun of me,
vos qui scitis dicite - you do not know what you are saying,
michi mesto parcite, - spare me, sorrowful as I am,
grand ey dolur, - great is my grief,
attamen consulite - advise me at least,
per voster honur. - by your honour.

Tua pulchra facies - Your beautiful face,
me fay planszer milies, - makes me weep a thousand times,
pectus habet glacies. - your heart is of ice.
A remender - As a cure,
statim vivus fierem - I would be revived
per un baser. - by a kiss.....


[....] Mea me confortat - I am heartened
promissio, - by my promise,
mea me deportat nega - I am downcast by my refusal

(Soprano and boys)
Oh, oh, oh - Oh! Oh! Oh!
totus floreo - I am bursting out all over!
iam amore virginali - I am burning all over with first love!
totus ardeo, - New, new love is what I am dying of!
novus, novus amor
est, quo pereo.

(Men)
Tempore brumali - In the winter
vir patiens, - man is patient,
animo vernali - the breath of spring
lasciviens. - makes him lust.

(Baritone)
Oh, oh, oh, - Oh! Oh! Oh!
totus floreo, - I am bursting out all over!
iam amore virginali - I am burning all over with first love!
totus ardeo, - New, new love is what I am dying of!
novus, novus amor
est, quo pereo.

(Women)
Mea mecum ludit - My virginity
virginitas, - makes me frisky,
mea me detrudit - my simplicity
simplicitas. - holds me back.

(Soprano and Boys)
Oh, oh, oh, - Oh! Oh! Oh!
totus floreo, - I am bursting out all over!
iam amore virginali - I am burning all over with first love!
totus ardeo, - New, new love is what I am dying of!
novus, novus amor
est, quo pereo.

(Chorus)
Veni, domicella, - Come, my mistress,
cum gaudio, - with joy,
veni, veni, pulchra, - come, come, my pretty,
iam pereo. - I am dying! ....

ah, love. i remember you.
meanwhile, i am spending way too many shilingi on Amarula, but is it worth the extra 10,000/= to have a bit of africa as i dream? why yes i believe so. thank you 66st wines.

musings while running

musings while running

i love when everything falls into place
only happens after i've given up the race
well i have eyes to see
i have life that's bursting forth inside of me.
so lets take the long way home
every moment i spend with you
lets make it slow, slow, slow
we'll count the moments as they go
~catherine maclellan

when you hear a song, is the message to you? or from you? is it meant for the moment and should you take heed? or is it just for the singer? or is it just chords?

when is my song no longer mine? i used to think when my songs and my play were performed for a crowd, they were still meant for me alone. but once everything is broken, do they now belong to a girl i've never met?

when the workers have all gone home, and it is just me and a 4 foot bird in fields of deep green coffee bushes, their little white flowers intoxicating, and the clouds clear, and the mountain is crisp and the vista suddenly extends forever and you can hardly breath for the beauty of it, is it for me alone? is it a smile? a blessing? a warning? or nothing at all? if i am not there to see it, if my heart does not skip a beat, is it meaningless?

if i am no longer yours, and your love is no longer mine, did i ever have it at all?

what is really mine? the few dollars-or shilingi- in my bank account? i suppose that belongs to the bank, unless i took them out and stuffed them under my pillow. but the pillow isn't mine either. it is my parents' or my landlord's... i once stole a thimble from a lost boy. that is mine. a faded painting with a faded promise. that is mine too.

my heart has many parts, the walls built thick with age. if i have given you part, when you no longer want it, do i get it back? or is it lost forever? does my heart grow bigger to make up for the partitions? or am i left with a little less for me each time? maybe those pieces still belong to others, not who they are now, but who they were then. the 6 year old, the 16 year old, the 21 year old... and yet just the right dart can somehow pierce the walls even now.

maybe it is better to save yourself for the mountain, the country, the perfect moment. at least they never change and you can always return and visit and even the coldest heart will beat.
 

A5 bartlett hotel

looking out at our driveway-house A5

come to africa, fall in love. i dare you not to.

come for too long and you are infected, longing to come back and uncontrollably urging everyone else you know to do the same. a powerful virus...

since we are here, we have convinced my aunts and uncles and cousin to visit us instead of our annual outer bank trip. the first group arrived this week. it is my cousins James and Alex's first trip out of america. a far cry from a leisurely trip to england or france, to the museums and restaurants. the Louvre is amazing, the Vatican worthy of unending examination, i wouldn't have missed Pompeii, while Ramses and the Pyramids still linger in my dreams... but if i could only choose one for my future children -if they may be- i would spend any extra cent to get them to the plains of africa, the lions in the misty mornings, the umbrella trees, and the herd of elephants with their babies towering over your jeep.